as 2009 ends....

i wanted to make a list of my top 10...

10. i made new friends
9. i conquered my fear of sleeping alone in a house (thank you graveyard shift...)
8. i got a kitchen full of awesome stuff
7. i learned how to knit
6. i spend a fun week in san diego with my husband. i got way burned, but it was soooo worth it!
5. i got to see a ton of family and friends all together in one place
4. i got to go to cozumel
3. i finally started grad school
2. i got my very own little home to share with my favorite person ever
1. i got MARRIED!!!!!

most of my top 10 relate to my number 1. that really is the best thing that happened this year. i'm so happpy. we get to celebrate our anniversary next month, and i think chris has something planned.

but, i think i could come up with a list of top 101, and it still wouldn't be enough. i just think about all that God has given me, and i get chills. i just pray that i am pleasing him through my marriage, my school, my whole life.

and with that i say, thank you 2009... bring on 2010!!!

*besos*

almost here!

i'm sitting at the kitchen table waiting for amy to get to my casa. we're going to bake tonight... apple pie and pound cake. yummy!!!!!

chris just walked into the kitchen... and he's so odd sometimes.

but, it's almost my first christmas as a married lady. how cool, yet bizzare is that?!?

there are about a million gifts under our cute little christmas tree. i swear a third of them are for amy (from my in-laws... she's their fave.) *cs is convinced everything under the tree is for me from his parents... okay, maybe i'm the fave*... but, it's so odd. i wrappped a gift today and wrote "to my beloved husband" on it. tee-hee. he's so cute. he's peeking at the gifts to see what i got him...

i love being his wife.

*besos*

it's done!!!!

semester one is done!!!

~besos~

oh my cow...

right now... i don't like grad school.

actually.. just the papers.. but still.

come on!

~besos~

oh dearest ford focus wagon

how i miss you.

while you left me stranded, i would still take you back if i could.

how sadend i am at losing you.

farewell my friend.

*besos*

ode to the ford focus wagon

*sigh*

my car is sitting in my parent's back yard.

just this sunday i decided i might want to name her flo.

chris says she needs to go see a mechanic.

poor little mini minivan...

i miss you!

~leilani~

how is this my fault now!?!?!?!

lame financial aid office!!!

i've had the most annoying time trying to get my school loan processed since before school started. the problem...

my name change.

no, not upset about that. i heart my new name. but, i applied for FAFSA while i was still legally martinez, but the school had o'roark. so, there is a huge issue because, even though the SSN is the SAME, the last names don't match.

so, the week before school started, when i found this out, i called FAFSA and they said that i could not change the name on the original FAFSA, and that i would have to file a new one. i went all the way to apu and met with my advisor, where he told me the same thing, called his supervisor to confirm, and then said, "yeah, you'll have to file again under the new name."

i did that.

now, the school as two FAFSA with two last names but the name SSN. and, for some reason, they can't process them. and, it's MY fault because i filed the second one when i was told that all apu needed me was to change the name on the original FAFSA.

umm, no. you told me that i needed to re-file with my new name!!!

grrrrrrr.....

~besos~

i love mondays

so, i have four days each week where i'm beyond busy with school. technically, i have 7 days each week where i'm beyond busy, but only four days where i actually have to go somewhere. anywho, 2 days where i have lots of things to do (you know, everything always falls on a saturday, and sunday is just crazy busy). but, mondays are fantastic.

i'm usually frantically trying to read books or write papers, or wash dishes, or something. really, monday is my only day where i can catch up on life. as i write this, i realize how crappy my mondays sound.

but they really aren't. and you want to know why?

my super cute, little husband is always sleeping in the bed room. he's not a small guy. i mean, he's slim, but at about 6 ft tall, he takes up a lot more space than i do. so, when i get up in the morning and he's still sleeping, it's fantastic. i walk in there sometimes *tre quietly* and my heart skips a beat when i see him all sleeping and peaceful. the best is when he's curled up in a ball..... and next to teddy. love it!

so, i love mondays. i get to catch up on school work and house work, and i get to be close to one of my greatest blessings. what more could i ask for?

~besos~

it has happened.....

chris started a blog.

cscottoroark.blogspot.com

no... it isn't regular life updates like me... he even says you have to check up my blog for that. thanks for the pressure, dearest one. but, it's the devotional blog he's been thinking about starting forever.

so, if you don't get to hear him teach on a regular basis, check it out. and if you're one of those who can't get enough of what goes on in his brain, about his walk with Christ, and about what he has to share, you can check it out to.

*besos*

i know... it's been a billion years...

lets just say.... school is in full swing. too many things to even begin to write about. i have 20 papers, 2 group presentations, 1 "just me" presentation, and 4 finals... in the next 8 weeks.

*sigh*

why did i want to go to grad school???? ahh yes... to help people. darn my desire to do that!!

*besos*

ps... Jesus is awesome. without Him and His love, i'd be lost. and chris has been a huge help too!

the goings on since the begining of limbo

i'm starting week two of limbo.... and i'm currently blogging while trying to figure out what to watch on tv. darn you daytime talk shows!

anywho, i've had an amazing time since quiting my job.... i won't go day by day, but i will talk up the highlights!

my first week of limbo was kinda dramatic. my dad went to the hospital because of his nosebleeds. he's okay now, but i took him to the dr on monday. he ended up having to get s small tear deep inside his nose cauterized. his ENT said that he has a tear left over from a break he made, like, 45 years ago. hopefully this will work, but for now, it seems like a tentative fix-it.

anywho, in all of that worry, i 1) took my little "sister", cassy, to plazita olvera and chinatown, 2) got blood drawn, 3) took learsi with me to APU to go get a ton of stuff done *ID card, parking permit, books*, 4) oh, learsi came home!, 4) did laundry and made yummy dinners, 5) had fun family time, and 6) packed for an O'Roark Family Trip to...... Las Vegas!

*the trip requires it's own post*

now i'm back home, starting week 2. chris is sleeping right now. today is our 7 month anniversary!! we're going to Target at some point today. then, it's off to lounge in the pool (just for you, kevin). theeeeeeen, we order pizza. remember?? our anniversary tradition???

limbo has been great so far.... oh, and we're going to san diego on wednesday for a few days. i could totally do this vacation thing for a while!

*besos*

it's friday!!!!

it's wednesday

and friday is my last day..... EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*besos*

only a week and a half left of work...

exciting?? yes!!! bizarre?? of course!!! i'm excited and freaked out all at the same time. hello, it's been a few years since i was in school full time. not to mention the fact that i have a husband now. AND, to top it all off, half of our income will be gone. funny thing is... i just noticed this verse on my computer...

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end.

They are new every morning.

Great is Your Faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:23

i think this little note with the verse written on it was amy's but it fell out of her bible one day. i picked it up and kept it. it has been taped to my monitor at work for a while now. but, it's perfect for my constant state of worry. besides, He watches over the smallest of birds. how much more will He look out for chris and i, who are His children?

this knowledge is what reminds me that it will all be okay.

*besos*

to all who read my blog...

dear faithful readers....

my in-laws want you to update your blogs. they say it's the only way they know what's going on in the world.... so, update!

*besos*

my husband is 28

this is him getting ready to feed crocs on our honeymoon. he's insane!

yesterday was chris' 28th birthday. if you ask him, his original plan *made many moons ago* was to be married in his early 20's and to be a dad by this time. he always thought that he would be pretty much like his dad in that respect. and while they're pretty stinkin' similar, this was not chris' lot in life.

God had better plans for him... hello, me!

things may not be what we intend them to become, but when we trust in God, they are always better than we can ever dream!

i praise God that His plan was different than chris'. i praise God that His plan was different than my own. and, i praise God because my husband is a man of great faith, he loves Jesus, and that is really the greatest thing!

Happy Birthday, baby!

*besos*

6 months ago...

i married the man of my dreams, my prince charming... you see i how happy i was that day?? i'm still that happy now. sure, being married is different. but, it feels so natural. if you ask chris, he'll tell you that it feels like he was never not married to me. i feel the same way. it's funny how you know people for years, and you tend to marry the person you've known for the least amount of time. well, we did anyway.

i'm so blessed that God gave me *and gave me to* the most amazing man. i see his love for me in everything that he does. even when he leaves me at night to go to work, i see how he loves me enough to work nights and not complain *too much* about it.

thanks you all for your prayers. please keep praying for us!

i'll leave you with some new pictures

*courtesy of the santa maria inn*

*besos*

don't tell michigan...

but i totally bought 2 cutco knives from lydia. i totally did. i practically begged chris to let me buy them... i'm way excited!

lydia is this super cool girl from church. i met her years ago, when chris and i started dating. she was part of the high school group then. now, she's entering our collage group. we're really happy to have her! anywho, she sells cutco knives now.

yesterday she was going to do a presentation to amy; which she did. but after we all realized that it was running day, we decided to have a huge presentation for the rest of us. yesterday was the first time i got home and found the girls waiting outside my door. i had gone to the store to get dinner fixin's... whole wheat spaghetti with turkey and veggie marinara sauce. it was yummy! i made this other concoction for amy. since she can't eat garlic i made turkey with onion and tomato for her to toss with her pasta. i guess it was yummy because she ate it all!

anywho, we did our two miles. best time yet! then we got home and i started cooking *and doing sit ups every now and then*. we ate our *super amazingly yummy* dinner. then lydia got to her presentation. it was too funny because i have to henckel's knives, which i guess are the major cutco competition. she told me to get my fave knives... guess what i got out. she was like, "what kind of knife is this?!?!" tee-hee! too funny!

anyway, long story short... i love cooking stuff. we have a ton of knives, but i always want more! and, after much talking to chris (and after a lot of watching amy lay strangely on the balance ball... had to through that in there), i decided on two knives.

now i can't wait for them to get to my casa!!!

thanks lydia!

*besos*

because chris is annoyed that i haven't blogged...

i shall blog about my fantastic weekend.... it started on thursday nite...

it really did. on thursday night, chris and i ate the leftovers from tuesdays "GAP mexican food night for eric". i must say, i make a mean enchilada. i think those were *almost* more popular tham king taco. actually, i know for a fact that may liked them more.

anywho, we ate leftovers for dinner. something smelled funny, but i couldn't really pin point it. anywho, everything tasted fine. so, we ate it. chris introduced me to Flight of the Conchords. it's bizzaro guy humor, but too funny. so, chris went to take a nap. i knitted. we got im all dressed and ready for work. and off he went at about 9:30ish.

i called him before i went to bed and he told me that his stomach was felling funk. i didn't really think it was the food because, if you know me, i'm the one who always gets super sick. so, since i was fine, i thought he was maybe tired and that was causing him to feel sick. i got off the phone, and went to bed. then i was woken up by stomach pain around 3 am. lets just say it wasn't fun.

i went back to bed because i was feeling a little better. i woke up at my normal time to get ready for work. got dressed, did my hair, was going to do my make-up and then it hit me. i was feeling really nauseated. so, i sat on the couch for a little bit. then i decided to finish getting ready for work. but it wasn't happening. i felt too sick. so, i sat down on the couch, and that's were chris found me when he got home. and guess what, he was still feeling not so bueno.

i called my manager to let her know i wasn't coming in, got into be with chris, and basically slept until about 1. it was great. i woke up, sat on the couch for a few hours then went back to bed. chris was half waking up, but i fell asleep again, so, he did too. basically, i slept my life away on friday. we went to target, got some stuff. amy came over that night and had lots of fun planning her trip to australia. she left around 11:30ish. i was sad, but then, i went to bed.

saturday. saturday was the day! i woke up around 9:30. chris kinda woke me up when he got home, but i was too gone to really say hello. anywho, i woke up. knitted some. did my balance ball dvd workout. did some bollywood booty. watched a lot of tv... while knitting. i wanted to get in the pool, but i didn't know what time chris was going to wake up. so, i took a shower. around 12:30, chris was kinda awake. so i washed dishes. around 1 we went to ruthie's house (chris' aunt) to wash both cars. i'm really the barer of the spray hose. chris does most of the work. amy drove by on her way home from the beach. this was the best part because i got her beach chair out of her car and decided to sit and lay out while chris was drying and such in the garage. oh the sun. i grew a newer appreciation for amy's fave past time.

she went home only to come back to bring ruthie her vacuum (amy has an issue with vacuumes...), and brought the boys with her. sam, max, and assuie.. those dogs crack me up. and, i think they like to knock me over. it's great fun. anywho, after she left, i went inside and hing out with ruthie while chris finished up the cars. we got to talking jewelry. i heart jewelry. and so does ruthie. she goes on these vacations every year to new mexico just for the sake of going out and checking out jewelry. i think i may go with her one day!

anywhom we went home, and got in the pool. we swam for about 45 minutes. we had to, our apartment would have killed us. it's beyond hot in there. then, after the pool, i made hot dog and potato burritos. we watched The Emperor's New Groove during dinner. i took a shower after. chris worked on songs for sunday morning worship while i... knit. then we went to bed around 10:30.

sunday was a typical sunday. woke up early. got to church by 8am. chris practiced with chad, the drummer. i had nursery duty. and, had new borns!!! too cute! jullian and tevita. the cutest little boys! i think the last time i held such a small baby was when elijah was born. *remember, elijah.. how i was your first baby sitter?? you were 3 days old, and your mom and dad needed to go to the store? i sat on the couch and held your little 7 lb self.. it was fantastic.*

okay, after the fun babies, we went to fudrucker's for lunch. *amazing burgers* then came home. elisabeth came over to give me birthday gift. totally a dress that i wanted! she left, chris got his computer out, and i went to lay out IN the pool. yes. at the shallow end. i think i got some color...

then we went to GAP. had a good service. came home around 11pm. i made chris a sandwich and i ate chips and salsa. then, around 11:30, we went to bed.

now it's monday morning, i'm at work in my offic with norma. i really should get back to work!!

chris, did you enjoy my long blog???

*besos*

astrid broke her thigh...

turns out that the block that we run is about 2 miles. not a big thing for amy, astrid or heather (who all work out, all the time). but i'm way impressed! i ran more than walked yesterday, and it was fun! we're waiting for elisabeth to come join us... but baldwin bed and breakfast is in full swing...

the best part of yesterday was this fun little diddy that chris got me for my birthday. oh, i'm 26 now. yep, happy birthday to me. we went to this super yummy korean bbq place in long beach. in fact, i want to go back! anywho, one of my birthday present from chris was Bollywood Booty. *he got me other awesome stuff too*

this thing is amazing. it's sooo fun. the moves don't really feel like a workout *other than the pain you tend to feel b/c it really is*, just like fun dancing. i'm totally using this at a teaching tool for elisabeth's lack of hip movement. and f this doesn't work... it's hopeless.

anywho, i showed it to astrid and she had to get up and do it. she was in full swing with her Rajsha move. and i think it stretched her thigh too much. poor girl. she couldn't run too well. i should call her and find out how her thigh is... but, it's too fun!!!

after our run, we went to dinner. i lead the girls to their new fave place. amy is already trying to figure out when she's going back. in fact, i don't think she'll come over to our house to eat unless we go there... it's really yummy. but i think it canceled out our run!

'tis fine! i'm working my booty *and the rest of my body really* tonite!

*besos*

leilani and the world of social work

the greatest news i have these days.... i got my loan for school! sure, we'll have to pay for it later, but at least there are funds for school now! that makes me very happy. you should have seen me the day i learned about it... i was shaking with joy! i even had to call chris regardless of the the fact that he was sleeping. it was a very happy day.

but of major importance: i had my internship interview. the place the great. they work with foster kids in the la area. it's a legal help agency, so i'll be working with lawyers, law students, and the infamous, DCFS (dept of family and children services). it was a really great place that did a lot of good. the only thing was that it caused me to cry my whole way home from work. mostly in anger. i'm sure people with think i'm crazy for thinking these things, and feeling these things... but, i was angry with Christians after interviewing at this place.

every office i walked into was all about over-turning Prop 8 and how a family is a family regardless of how many moms or dads there are. and, at first i thought, "God, why am i always in places like this? why is this the community i'm working with?" and it isn't even that this is the target community that this agency is helping, it's that those are the people working there.

then it dawned on me that it was the nature of this field in the US, and most of the world, i'm sure. these are the people that promote social welfare. then it occurred to me... where are the Christians? where are we to show Christ's love to those less fortunate than us? why are we so caught up in our "conservative" boxes that we think helping other is somehow too "liberal" for us to do? why are these people who don't love Christ doing all the work that we should be.

it was this that caused my heart to ache. i mean, really. i just don't get it. we're in our churches crying about gay marriage and abortion when there are children without parents that need us, when there are elderly who have no money and no where to go. we're afraid to go down to skid row because there are people with major problems out there. we're willing to learn all we can about theology (not that it's a bad thing, bc i think we could all use it), but we're afraid to put these things in practice.

i've always said that Jesus was a radical man... and we all know that He was here to reach the sinner. but sometimes i wonder how willing we are to reach the sinner. to help the poor, to clothe the naked, to feed the hungry. we are His hands and His feet, but where are we??

please pray that we will all have this ache, to really reach those less fortunate, so that the world will really see Christ and His love.

*besos*

well...

i'm finally Leilani O'Roark at work... like for real. if i call anyone, that's the name that appears on their caller id... how odd...

*besos*

it's been forever.. i know...

things have been going well. mostly work, work and cooking. i totally missed blogging about Resolved. it was Fantastic. it really was. there were about 4,000 people in attendance this year, so that was a little insane. the messages were really good. i think you might be able to check them out no the web page... check it out... and maybe come next year!
www.resolved.org

other major thing... i got the information for my possible internship placement. i have to go for an interview, then hope that they pick me for the position. but, aside from that, i'm kinda excited. the place is called The Alliance for Children's Rights. i wasn't sure if i wanted to work with anything child related, and i told the people at APU who placed me that. but i guess they thought i should. it looks really cool.
http://www.kids-alliance.org/Default.asp
so, i now need to go find something that looks professional enough for my interview... you'd think i'd have something by now!

*besos*

so...

after reading my previous post i came to one conclusion... i say "cool" entirely too much.

that's all.

*besos*

chris and the msw students

so, yesterday there was a field orientation of all full-time MSW students at azusa. it was pretty cool. we did a campus tour. let me just say, after CSULB, APU is downright tiny! chris and i were like, "this is it???". a few of the other people came from small schools too, so it wasn't a big deal to them. but i was like, "really, this is the BIG parking lot???" there's like 500 spaces. i'm used to HUGE parking lots, along with parking structures! plus, it's about 20 minutes to walk through the whole school, while talking time to notice all the nice things.... biggest thing though, NO FAST FOOD PLACES. at CSULB there are like 50 places you can go for food. including El Pollo Loco, Subway, and Carl's Jr. here, there's the caf. as in cafeteria...

but, all in all. i think i'm going to like it. it might be smaller than what i know, but that makes it more intimate. my MSW class with me about 40 people. only about 25 are full-time students. and of those 25, there are about 10 who have my same Community Practice concentration. so it'll be really cool to work so closely with my instructors and my peers. plus, before we started the orientation, we PRAYED. how cool it that?! i mean, it was kinda expected because it's a Christian school, but still not expected at all. it was really cool.

now, to the fun part. chris really wanted to come with me. which i think is fantastic, because he gets to go through all of the program with me. i was the only one who brought family (tee-hee.. it's still odd to think of chris as my family). and, they included him in everything. there were so few people there that when we had to to partner interviews as an icebreaker, he was paired with this girl. he had to get up in front of everyone and "introduce her". and, she had to "introduce" him. so, the whole program knows we're newly weds and that he's in interpreter at Long Beach Memorial. that was cool.

then we went over interviews and what to expect on our interviews for our internship. that was cool. i hate interviews. i always feel really good about them, but i'm secretly freaking out too. i guess it's good if it remains secret! we split up into groups and did mock interviews with the department admin who were there. chris didn't interview (but one of my future professors was like, "you're going to get an honorary MSW"), but he did give his input on us. which i thought was really cool.

so, yesterday was good for a few reasons. 1) as able to meet people that could potentially be great friends. 2) i got valuable input on interviewing. 3) i was able to meet my instructors and hopefully they were able to see that i really want to be in the program. 4) they al met my cute husband and got to see that he too is interested in what i'm doing. 5) i was able to spend that day with chris. 6) i saw how important what i want to achieve is to chris and how important it is to him to be there for me.

yesterday was a good day.

*besos*

after the wedding comes....

school, of course!

i think this blog is about to become all things MSW...

*besos*

the official that follows....

i am now legally Leilani O'Roark.

YAAAAY!

i went to the DMV yesterday morning to change my name. it wasn't too bad. the dude at the window asked me if i really wanted to change it. i just smiled and said "yes". i had to get a new picture taken... even though i *loved* my other one. i hope this new one is just and nice!

then, i had to go to the Social Security Office to change my name there. oh my murder, was this the *worst* place ever! i was sitting waiting for 2 HOURS. i was sitting next to these women who were arguing about how they didn't get the money the government "owed" them. really?? i wish the government owed me! anywho, i had enough time to walk to the cvs nearby to buy some snacks. they finally called my number, and i changed my name.

ahh, the things i do for love.

*besos*

so... i haven't done this in a while...

i really should keep this blog up to date... i think the thing that stops me is the lack of cool pictures i have to add to my little stories.. oh well!!!

we went up to santa maria this weekend to visit the in-laws. we hadn't been up there since the wedding. it was really good to go. kevin was working on his new yard project all weekend. chris helped him for a bit. this left dini and i with really only one thing to do... SHOP!

it's great. i think my mother-in-law enjoys spoiling me. i will enjoy it while it lasts, because i know that as soon as i pop out a baby, all attention will go there.

so, dini taught my how to knit a scarf. i'm way excited about that! i had to start my little practice scarf a billion times. how i ended up with 13 stitches after starting with 10? i will never know! but, i'm getting better. now i need to learn all the cool dramatic stuff so i can make sweaters! that is my goal!

anywho, the best part of the weekend?? me left knee. remember that yard project kevin was working on? well, on saturday, as dini and i were on our way to shop 'til we drop, i totally fell some how and knocked myself up real good. i scraped my knee and gave myself some pretty impressive bruises. it still hurts a bit to bend my knee, but it's getting better!

then it was monday, and we drove home. it was really great to go up to santa maria again and not have a billion appointments to run to. while i enjoyed the wedding planning, i enjoy lazying around with kevin and dini better. we didn't do too much of that, but it was still fun.

the only depressing part... no orcutt burger!!!! that just means i'll have to eat it twice on father's day!

*besos*

It's Official!!!!

we finally got our marriage license!!

now i can change my name and everything....

YAAAAAAAAAAY!

*besos*

1 high fever and two days later...

so, my fever went all the way up to 102.3 on thursday... then it came back down to 99.5 that night. oi, i hate being sick!

luckily, i'm feeling better. still tired and lethargic, not to mention slightly lightheaded. but, at least i'm not all fever-y. chris would wake me up in the middle of the night with a phone call so that i could take my tylenol. how sweet. he'd use his big boy voice over the phone so i would get out of bed and actually down the stuff. now that's love!

anywho, it's saturday. i'm at work. lame.

i hope i feel better soon!

ps... what the heck grey's anatomy!

*besos*

sad...

i'm sick. yes. so sick, in fact, that i'm going home early. why, oh, why does home have to be so far?? why does traffic have to be so bad? why didn't i stay in bed this morning???

**sigh**

pray that i get better. say no to ear infections and chest tightness... holy mother! pray i don't have N1H1 Influenza A!!! yeah, i had to use the real name. why? because i think pigs are cute.

*besos*

i can't believe i haven't mentioned this!

i totally finished my first scrapbook!!! it was just one of those paper ones from Creative Memories that pretty much only needs pictures.... but i totally made one! i used our engagement pictures, so it's super cheese to the max. but still!! totally cool! i have to take it up to santa maria so dini can see it, since technically, she created the scraping monster that i am today. i'm in the process of working on a scrapbook of our honeymoon, of which 4 pages are done! and, i need to print wedding fotos for amy to scrap... not to mention pictures for the parents to all have up in their homes... i'm too behind!

*besos*

and breathe...

i got my blood drawn today. it was FANTASTIC. well, as fantastic as getting your blood drawn could be.

remember my previous fiascos?? the endless poking, bruising, multiple visits b/c people don't know how to draw blood?? the general fear because of all these things.. it ended today.

i went this morning and decided to ask for the same girl that drew my blood forever ago when i had to do the redo. the one who saved me after that lame girl poked me three times, getting nowhere, and collapsing my vein. yes, the girl who reminded me that getting labs done could be *slightly* okay.

my appointment was at 7:50am. i think i got my blood drawn at about 8:35am. i waited because i knew she knew what she was doing.

lo and behold, it was great. so easy! why couldn't it always be that way! you can bet i will be remembering her name!

*besos*

100 days!!!!

hello milestone!

it's been 100 days since i became chris' wife. i must say... it's amazing. i think i love him more now than i did 100 days ago. really, you don't think you can love anyone more than what you know, but it grows. it really grows.

you know how much you think that loving someone more today that you did yesterday is kinda lame... well, it's totally true. every day i love chris more. sometimes i think i might explode. but, who knew this love grew in leaps and bounds! it's amazing!!!

i love the man that he is. i love how i can see his love for Christ just radiate and beam from him. i love that because he loves Jesus so much, i know he loves me. i love how safe i feel with him. and, i love knowing that i am always in his prayers because he wants me to be safe.

it's been an amazing 100 days. some of them have been difficult and tears have been shed. but i will say one thing, i truly love being married. i am ridiculously blessed. i can see God's love for me every time i see my husband. and, i know he feels the same way.

*besos*

where the heck is delaware!!!!

http://jimspages.com/States.htm

so, i have done this thing about a million times. and delware still tends to elude me. lame... enjoy!

*besos*

again!!!!!

oh the work out fun...

These are my two new workout buddies... And let me tell you, they really help! My Bollyrobics is awesome. REALLY. there are 3 dances from three different movies, and each dance includes a warm up, step by step teaching, the actual dance, and a cool down. it turns into a nice 40 minute work out. i usually try to do some weights after i do a dance routine. and The Shred... well that just kicks my butt. the first 5 minutes are brutal. but it gets *a little bit* better. you should have seen my on saturday... i was in pain. it hurt to sneeze! but, it's good!!

anywho, yesterday was great. heather and elisabeth came over for dinner. heather came after the gym, during my Shred. so, she just jumped in with me. it was cool. then we did Bollywood!!! man was that funny! thanks, heather, for trying! then, after dinner, we were telling elisabeth about heather's experience, so she had to try it. so, after heather left (to go to boxing. she is very champion!), we decided to do mahive (best. dance. ever.). chris has the best rendition of what happened. this is his reenactment *he was in the kitchen*....

leilani: "move your hips elisabeth!"

elisabeth: "i can't! they don't move!"

leilani: "no, your hips! move your hips!"

elisabeth: "i can't!!!! i'm white!!!"

it was awesome!

so, i ended up doing about an hour and a half of work out yesterday. hopefully, this will continue. i'm currently sore. amy said that it goes away the more you move. must. keep. moving.

oh, and i get to do a 5k run/walk on saturday. last year i was more run that walk.. not so much now....

*besos*

coming up to the 3 month mark....

friday will be three months.

how exciting!!!

that's all.

*besos*

darn it.

this easter we went o my parents house. sister and viko were there, yay. but, being that she's my sister and we have that "i tell you the truth about how you look b/c we're family and you love me anyway..." thing going on.... she asked me about my weight.

yes, i've gained weight. no, mami, i'm not working out. no anyone else, i don't have too much time to do so. darn it ashley, when are we going for our walking date?!?

*sigh*

it sucks. between thanksgiving to now i've gained about 10 pounds. yikes! i don't rally know what happened. i think it was a combination of: the holidays, the fact that my dress was big and i needed to fill it in, honeymoon food, lots of juice in the fridge, i love pasta... you name it.

so, i see lizzy all cute and getting skinnier by the minute, and it makes me think, "man, i need to get on that train." however, i've always had the biggest problem with will power. i mean, really... have to met my shopping problem? i think the only thing that stops me is having to explain spent money to chris. that and the fact that i never have a chance to go to the mall!

but... i think i came up with a solution.

i bought 5 lb weights and The Shred dvd. it's by jillian from the Biggest Loser. and, i have this workout thing in the fitness mags i get. don't laugh. yes, i get fitness magazine. it's kinda like a motivator. anywho, i did 4 of the 10 work outs the mag, and my butt was kicked. really. i was dying. man am i out of shape!! gracie, remember when i could hack the whole latin cardio thing!?! i think i'd die in it now!

okay, so here is my new plan. and i tell you so you can all help me keep this routine up.
1) bring oatmeal and yogurt to work for breakfast
2) bring lunch to work (no, i don't usually do that... but i will)
3) do some sort of work out between getting home and dinner 4 times a week
4) hopefully get together with ashley about going walking on saturday mornings
5) eat smaller portions
6) drink more water
7) make healthier meals (helps me and cs!)

so, today, i will get home prepare dinner, do about 35 minutes of whatever this Shred is, then do dinner. maybe i can get chris in on it too! eh, he just wants to see my butt get all cute a perky again.... man do i miss the ymca!

*besos*

the waiting game....

so,

i'm currently in the nurses station waiting for my patients to come in. it's lame. whenever i have am appointment, i try really hard to be on time, if not early.

but, not these people. grrrrr...

not only that, once they are here, their docs are running so far behind that the patients end up being in the clinic for 2 hours. even more! it's lame....

so, next time you have to go to the doctor, 1) get the earliest appointment in the day (that's when the docs are still *kinda* on time), and 2) be on time!!! or early!!!

that's all.

*besos*

kevin and his train

my father-in-law, loves trains. it cracks me up. growing up, my dad always loved train stuff. so, when chris told me about how his dad loved trains, i was like, "yeah, my dad does too." then we proceeded to tell me in more depth and detail... would that my dad loved trains this much.

anywho, here's a cool shot of kevin giving people a ride on his train. yes, i said his... i guess we all know what my children will be doing when they visit their santa maria grandparents...

*besos*

cuteness on parade...

i love little animals....

*besos*

i'm tired....

that's all. physically, emotionally... every "lly" you can think of... i'm just tired.

part of me thinks it stress. the other part thinks i'm going crazy. either way, it sucks.

*besos*

it's almost two years.

this weekend will be the two year mark of something that shaped, and is still shaping, so many lives around me. mike's passing.

it's been a long road. really, i think if he were to see us all at two years, he wouldn't recognize us at all. well, physically we all look the same (except amy and elisabeth, they're looking good!), but spiritually, we are all different people. and, i think we're better than we were then.

i've said it before, and i'll say it until i leave this earth... we are in the process of fulfilling what mike wanted for the Christian youth of the world. he wanted us to be closer to God. he wanted us to trust more, be more faithful. i can honestly say that i am. it's been a struggle, but i know there is an amazing prize for all my perseverance.

i have seen us all grow in so many ways; it's incredible. i know it still hurts. really, it's painful for all of us to think of what happened to years ago and what has been since then. but, God shapes us in ways we won't understand until The Day of Our Lord.

i am incredibly grateful for all the pain. it sucks, but it turns our eyes to the One who heals all, the One who will hold us in the mists of all the pain.

we must continue to pray for each other. and always know that Christ is supreme over all.

*besos*

i cut my hair...

of course i have no pictures... but believe me, it's lighter by about 6 inches.

i was freaking out at the salon, but i made a decision that i would cut my hair post wedding.

i'm in love with it.

really, it's fabulous. the ends were so dry and frazzled, they needed to be cut. my biggest fear was that i'd get "mom hair". but i thin kthis is borderline not that. funny thing though, i think that if frances and i stand together, we'll look a lot alike. except, her hair is shorter.

anywho, the shortness really brings out my curl. i didn't realize that i had more "curl" than "wave"... thanks papi. really, the curl gene was so not from my mom!

okay, i'll stop ranting about my fabulous hair. hey grace, the slightly darker baldwin with fabulous hair is back!

*besos*

to astrid from dini...

hey,

my mother-in-law said to tell you to update your blog.

*besos*

10 things i've learned in the last 2 months

i've been a wife for over two months now. it really is quite incredible. i love being chris' wife. i love coming home to a warm hug. i love making dinner for him... and i love that he doesn't mind washing dishes. i love that he wants to keep me safe and has this urgency to provide for me. i love that he's my best friend and that everything is so right. like, we were born to be together... eh, i guess we were!

anywho... here is a list of things i've learned in the last two months. chris said that i could make a public list if it was all good things about him...

1. it's really hard to spend time together when we both work different schedules. we only see each other about 4 hours a day. because of this i..
2. miss my friends. don't get me wrong, i love my husband. i love being with him. but i miss being able to call someone and not feel bad because i'm cutting into the 4 hours we have together. i feel like i'm detached from them... but i still love them!
3. i don't like sleeping alone. as in, alone in my house because chris is at work. sometimes i want to sleep on the couch so i'll have more of a view of the house. but i don't. we have our bed. i sleep there.
4. i can't wait for my work day to be over. i can't wait to get home and be with chris. (see how i have this strange internal conflict???)
5. it's hard to figure out what to make for dinner every day. even with someone who will eat anything. maybe this is just my problem because my meals have to be perfect... but still, kinda difficult.
6. i LOOOOOVE saturday and sunday nights. this is when chris and i get to actually sleep in at the same time. it's AMAZING. i love it...
7. chris totally talks in him sleep. it's too funny. this past sunday night, he had full on conversations at various times in the night. it doesn't startle me too much anymore (besides, i grew up in room where the other person would scream at night... thanks learsi!). it's kinda funny though.
8. chris is wierd. really, you have no idea. he does some really odd stuff. but it's too funny.
9. i love how much i laugh with chris. i love how happy i am.
10. i'm sooooo in love with my husband. i think God everyday for him. chris is this amazing person. anyone can tell you that. but, i love him more than i ever had before. it's like it grows exponentially every minute. i'm grateful for every moment we have together.... i really love being a wife.

*besos*

please pray for my amy...

copper is none to good. amy was going to call the vet today to see what the next course of action is. he hasn't eaten since friday, and he's too weak to walk.

please pray that she will be able to handle whatever it is that God has in store for her..

*besos*

all you Christian kids...

who remembers Psalty?!?!?!

i've been singing these songs since i was really little... i mean, "I'm gonna wrap up myself for Christmas!" anyone?

way before Veggie Tale's (who, sorry jules, can't light a candle to Psalty), there was this whole world of Christian cartoons and musical oddness... and he was the king of it all.

i was singing these songs to chris on our way to church yesterday. it was too funny because i told him that i had to find these cd's and buy them. it really is a tradition that i HAVE to continue. really, Christmas morning will never be the same if i don't have random Psalty Christmas Carols in the background...

ahh... "it's not by might, nor by power, BUT, byyyy the Spirit... Praise the Lord!"

*besos*

i love lazy saturdays...

and today wasn't even that lazy!

we went grocery shopping. that was fun... but the real treat, well, there were two treats.
1) we went to OSH, and bought this cool terra cota pot and some pretty flowers. chris and i potted them and it looks so pretty. i named all the plants... stella, carmen, and mona... so pretty!
2) we had hawaiian food delivered. oh my yummyness!!! it was so good! but, next time, we'll be getting one plate. yeah, they were kinda big.

now, i'm watching tv and chris is trying to pick songs for worship tomorrow.

still getting used to my new life... but it's great so far!

*besos*

that'll show me to hug a baldwin...

i love elisabeth... really, i do. i even go to her super fun tea things (ps.. had fun!)... but there is something amis in the baldwin home. and i think it starts with a sore throat.. or that's the rumor i heard...

yesterday, at GAP, lizzy was coughing like a son of a gun. not sexy. but, her singing voice was kinda husky, so maybe a little sexy?? great, i sound like astrid.

anywho, she was sitting next to me. coughing. don't really mind the coughing. i felt bad because it sounded like it hurt.

however, i do mind that i don't feel good today. i was already feeling not bueno yesterday, then i sit next to coughing girl (i do love you, really!)... now, i feel like getting back into bed.

i think i might leave work early.

lame.

*besos*

i'm sorry chris.. but i have too...

this cracks me up. my husband thinks i'm a nerd... but really, how funny is this!!

i want a baby pig!!

*besos*

OH MY COW!!!!! EEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

so,

i got to work today and turned on my computer. i checked my work email... and you. will. never. guess.

my dr boss, christina, got notification from the ADA that OUR ABSTRACT WAS ACCEPTED!!!!!

holy mother or all cows!!!!

our abstract will be in in this years "Supplemental Abstract booklet of the June 2009 edition"....

can you believe it!!! and i'm on the list of authors!!!!

EEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

~besos~

this is OFFICIALLY my fave wedding picture...

courtesy of Viko...

Love it... Soo pretty!!

*besos*

please pray for my dearest amy...

i mentioned a few months ago about her awesome dog copper. she thinks his time is nearing. the cancer lumps have been getting larger, multiplying, and traveling. he isn't doing good at all.

please pray that amy will be okay during all of this.

*besos*

oh the dark side...

so this past saturday amy had a scrap booking party. it was this creative memories thing. for those of you who don't know me, i don't scrap. like, at all. my closest attempt was years ago when i was in ohio, and the ladies at fran and barbie's church would get together every friday night and scrap. i was so lost... it was odd...

fast forward to now. i still think it's the odd cult. really.. scrap booking??? and there are people who have TONS of them.

anywho, when amy invited me i was like, "eh, sure. why not?" i knew kevin and dini would be in town, so i figured maybe dini and i could head over there... like i was going to buy anything? i mean, really.. scrap booking?

turns out, it's kinda cool. they have all this pretty stuff. ahh, i love pink paper. plus, i got to hold pretty little lana... before she started crying.

dini bought me stuff. i already know what i'm going to do... a cute litte engagement shoot paper scrapbook, and a honeymoon scrapbook. i'm kinda excited.. let's see if this actually pans out the way i want it to.

until then, i'm a mean online scrapper!! check out our wedding page!

http://theoroarks.weebly.com/

*besos*

the sun is shining... and....

i got wedding pictures from my cousin, barbie... i had to post this one of my dear husband...

he's so cute. i'm so in love with him. really, i can't seem to tell him enough. sometimes i catch myself looking at him and thinking, "i am sooo in love with this man!"

chris is proof of how much God loves me.

*besos*

horrible weather and elisabeth is going to astrocamp....

and this is what the mountains look like right now!!!

anywho, chris drove me to work this morning. it was kinda creepy. it rained all night, so the was water everywhere... i think we were going between 50 and 55 mhp. the car hydroplaned once or twice, but we made it to CHLA safely.

i spoke to chris when he got home from dropping me off... he said that he had to get of the freeway and take the streets the rest of the way because they were so bad. he said the 710 is flooded already, and that a ton of streets are flooded. nice. the best part, the pool at our complex is over flowing... which means some of our downstairs neighbors might get flooded... lame.

anywho, we needs rain, but this is kinda ridiculous!

*besos*

just thought i'd put one up...

us in cozumel... on the eastern side of the island. this was a little beach called chen rio. i think it was my favorite beach... it was beautiful!!

check out how hot my husband is!

*besos*

EEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

the photog's called chris today...

Our Pictures Are Ready!!!!

since they don't want to mail them to us, dini is gonna go pick them up, and save them 'til they come down next weekend. chris asked if i wanted to make a lightning trip up there to pick them up... i decided that i could wait...

::sigh::

i wish i could have them now!!!

*besos*

arrgggg....

i hate when my boss talked to me like i'm some sort of idiot.

that's all.

*besos*

it's been 13 days...

and i had one of those moments yesterday....

every now and then it hits me that i'm married. i know, i know... i knew i was getting married, and i knew it's a forever thing. but it's like sometimes it's like the most normal thing in the world, then something happens, a tiny thing, and you realize, "holy cow!!! i'm married!!"

i had one of those yesterday.

after dinner, chris went off to take a nap. since we works night, he tend to need those in the evening. when better than after a full stomach! i had him get his work clothes ready so that i could iron and get his lunch together so he could just wake up and not have too much to do before work.

since i was all alone, and i didn't feel like washing all those dishes, i put a movie in and started watching it. i was about half way through when i hear the bedroom door open and see my cute little husband start walking towards the couch i was on.

i ask him if he's okay. he tell me he is. and i ask him why he isn't sleeping. he says he wasn't able to sleep the whole time he was in there. that, sine he couldn't sleep, he may as well not sleep with me on the couch. i thought that was sweet.

so, i move so he can sit under the covers with me. then, as he's half asleep i looked at him.

that's when it hit me.

i was like.... holy cow!!! i'm married!!! there was this half naked man on the couch with me... and he was all mine... in both a happy and odd way.

so, i smiled, kissed his forehead and went back to my movie...

i can't wait to get home from work!

*besos*

i couldn't help stealing some from fran!

such a lovely day!!

*besos*

i don't even know where to begin...

these past couple of weeks have totally flown by.... yes, i'm a married woman now. it's fabulous. our honeymoon was fantastic... even the part where chris fed wild crocodiles... how insane is he!! needless to say i was freaking out at that part...

i wish i had keep up better about the final week and the day of. it was just so crazy. things were smooth, then chris hurt himself. that became the only thing on my mind, so the planning and all of that was shifted to my fabulous amy. she's amazing! so all i had to do was put on my pretty dress, and marry the man of my dreams.

now, i'm sitting in my new office (norma single-handedly shifted everything from the worlds tiniest office to this big on with a window!) trying to think about how to fit everything that has happened, and i really can't.

i'm a wife, my husband needs me all the time... really, he needs help tying his shoes! i dropped him off at work last night, slept in the apartment alone *i don't know how i fell asleep*, drove to the metro station across the street form his job so i could take the train to work and he could have a way to get home... then, today after work he's gonna pick me up from said metro station, we're going to the grocery store then going home so i can make dinner... i'll probably wash some dishes, try to organize my life, get chris ready for work... drop him off at work, come home... you get the idea...

this is my life now, i rather like it... all but sleeping alone!

*besos*

please pray for chris...

most of you know that he mangled his wrist pretty bad last week...

well, this morning they wheeled him off to surgery. he has bad nerve damage, and they wanted to see if they can fix anything.

i know he'll be alright, and the God is control, but i'm kinda angry about the whole thing. i'm not sure who i'm angry with... but it all just sucks super bad.

pray for chris' cut, his surgery, and his healing time. pray for my stress level and my heart.... pray that i can pull it together so that i can actually be of some use to him when he'll really need me.

*besos*

in 10 days....

i will be wearing my beautiful dress. i will be taking pictures with my girls. i will be freaking out, yet eerily calm. i will be ridiculously giddy. i will be beyond excited. and i will be getting married.

I CAN'T WAIT!!!!

*besos*

very cool thing...

so,

i'm a researcher. sure, this sounds a little out there and vague. eh, it is! but the coolest things happen in research. you meet tons of people, and you really feel invested in helping the population your researching. some days it really sucks... like most days. but for the most part, it tends to be rewarding.

anywho, doctors are required to write about all of these studies. you know, like the reports you hear on tv and what not. so, my doctors (my bosses on my main study) have been working on this paper to send to the ADA (American Diabetes Association). they finally had to send the abstract (the pre-paper, paper) for approval this week. if the abstract gets approved, then they have a year or so to write the full paper on the research to be presented at a national conference. yeah, i work on stuff like that... how cool is that?!?

but, here's the best part. the biggest thing for these papers is the list of authors and how they are listed. the best spot is at the end, that goes to the top, most important doc, the first spot goes to the main doc who actually did the studying (but, the top dog doc, it still better.. even if they didn't do all the work! so true int eh real world!). then you include all the other docs who worked on the research. there's an order there, but i don't know what...

okay... then, if you happened to help in any way... as in, if your research staff, your name gets put in at the very end of the paper, in the recognitions.. hence, where my name is on two papers floating around somewhere.

BUT.... in this study... MY NAME IS IN THE LIST OF AUTHORS.

yes... out of nowhere, my main doc boss decided to not put me in the recognitions, but as an actual author.. for all my hard work. how awesome is that!!!

ha... if it gets approved, then you can google me and a real scholastic paper will come up!

*besos*

I Heart Disneyland!!!!

thank you astrid and heather for working at place that gets us in for so little!!! that's all.... such a happy place!!!

I LOVE MY DRESS

i went to my final fitting yesterday.... my dress is AMAZING!!!! i'm so in love iwht my dress. i told chris that i was never going to take it off....

*besos*

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

WE HAVE OUR OWN PLACE!!!!!! FOR REAL!!!!!!

the first one is my fabulous new kitchen!!!! for as long as i can remember, i've always wanted my very own kitchen.... to put my very own pots and pans away in... to ccok my very own meals... and not wash my own dishes... AND I HAVE ONE NOW!!!! *chris just sent me a picture of our new fridge in the kitchen!!*

the second one is me *duh*in the livingroom. don't mind all the cables. i think the previous tenants watched cable everywhere.... but, my handy man can do many things...

thanks for all your prayers!!!!

*besos*

oh my beefy beefiness...

chris is going today to sign papers... AND TO GET THE KEYS!

holy mother... i'm really getting married in 3 weeks. i'm really going to be a wife to chris o'roark.

*nervous laughter*

!!!!!!HOW EXCITING!!!!!

in three weeks, about 200 people will be getting ready for my wedding...

HOLY MOSES!!!!

*besos*